My whole existence is flawed.

The holidays are gonna be over real soon. Like, in 3 days' time, and it's back to the hype and buzz in school. Everyone's damn paranoid about their exam results, and I wish I would buck up just a little bit. My homework's untouched, and I haven't studied. {panicks}

-

What I Remember Doing During The Hols:

1) Running quite a bit for 50 Laps during Teachers' Day.
2) Watching Hairspray after that
3) Ratatouille on Sunday night
4) Khairiah's "Birthday Surprise" on Monday, which she figured out anyway. The me crying part was a bit freaky, I didn't know how to react and the cake was good lah.
5) Movie Marathon. I lasted about 2 movies (which I already watched: High School Musical & Borat) and then fell asleep halfway during Music and Lyrics, The Holiday was too boring for me, I slept one quarter into the show and then never woke up till 9 am the next morning)
6) Watched 1408, a bit fucked up and draggy in my opinion, but quite good nonetheless.
7) Chem SPA test in the morning, and then went Temasek Poly to meet Bianca & Evan. Evan had his Napfa test, Bianca left. Therefore I did a bit of my homework. Yay.
8) Was supposed to go to Rachel's birthday party, but Iylia can't go, and Karina's not going, so I decided to go shopping with mummy instead.

-

Oh, Karina's chalet later! I haven't packed yet, and I need $ to pay Dong for the booze, I need $ to pay Cheryl+Lingyu and I need money to buy birthday presents. And snacks! Snacks for Karina's party. What a catastrophe. I feel the hole in my pocket becoming bigger. (rob a bank)

Junk food, booze, laughs, and all that. Yay. Pity that Bad Obsession has to leave halfway due to unforeseen circumstances (like the FFAF show).

I sometimes believe I'm a masochist. I subject myself to so much shit, when I can easily just shove them all away. Fuck it lah. Apparently, I've "changed too much".

Oh, maybe, for an extra measure, I should say "I don't feel pain; I am pain"

I laughed at this today

Norman says (1:28 PM):
if a rooster lays an egg in a triangle room
will the egg roll left or right
JackOff[Jolyn] says (1:28 PM):
roosters dont lay eggs, silly!
Norman says (1:29 PM):
wtf
i dont you are stupid
thought*
JackOff[Jolyn] says (1:29 PM):
whats the white colour stuff in an egg called?
Norman says (1:29 PM):
egg is not white
until cooked
JackOff[Jolyn] (1:29 PM):
: LOLOLOLOLOL
Norman says (1:30 PM):
correct?
JackOff[Jolyn] says (1:30 PM):
ok, i rephrase my question, whats the transparent fluid in the egg called
Norman says (1:30 PM):
the no white liquid
JackOff[Jolyn] says (1:30 PM):
huh.
wtf? lololol

Norman says (1:34 PM):
Is that supposed to be a joke?

hahahahahaha

Should I be happy?
I feel damn fucked up, and maybe stepping out of the pavement, onto a highway filled with speeding cars isn't such a bad idea. Maybe it doesn't hurt as much to die. Suicide Valley, much? Thank you for the memories, but they hurt way too much. I can't remember a day when I never thought about you. I wish I could just get the fuck up and move on. At times, I'm afraid I'll never move on, and at times I'm afraid I'll move on and forget. Oh god, "Make up your mind, bitch". Or if you can't, fling yourself off the damn building. Boys are idiots. I never said I never agreed with that.