Every now and then I fall apart

Why are people magnanimous and forgiving? I don't see why and how anyone will choose to be so bloody 'nice'. I really wonder if that 'selfless forgiveness' is really all an act. I have this gut feeling it is, and it makes me so disgusted how you are so fucking pretentious and twisted.
Just like how I am.
The highs don't register; the lows are so frequent, it doesn't come as a surprise anymore. I expect it, actually. Like the dull hum of a refrigerator, I barely notice it anymore.

Are you inhuman?
Cos I am.
*

Watched 27 Dresses with Khairiah, Cheryl, Lingyu, Halimatul, Deborah and Germaine after lunch at Lido on Friday. I enjoyed the movie, I don't know why, since it's such a typical, sappy chick flick. The movie made me a little sad though, for reasons unknown. I enjoyed myself, it has been a while since the 7 of us got together out of school.

Met up with Trish, Karina, Aaron, Skid afterwards, before they left to home club. I ended up dumping my school u and wearing Nita's (nice) nightie to Chips and home club with Adriel and Josh, where a few of us sat down by the river side drinking cheap beer. I saw things that got me upset, but I thought I handled it pretty well. Then we ended up at Christian's (?) place.

Went home, showered, slept, rushed to meet Hansen at Cityhall for Fasten Your Seatbelts! :D Caught Iron Buddha and Bad Obsession's sets, and in between, we went to Raffles City to eat Subway and just catch up. Afterwards, met up with a few of the Niners, before Trish and I headed to home club (again). Needless to say, we did our fair bit of drinking, before we headed to Christian's place. This time, I fell asleep in a reallllly awkward position.

My life is so boring.

Sunday night, and I'm home. Exhausted, I haven't gotten much sleep. Thanks to drinking on both Friday and Saturday night. I think at this rate, I'll either die from exhaustion or liver failure.

/

Who do you think I am?
Whoever it is you think I am....I'm not.

'Cos this hope is greater than you know.

Help me take my mind off things.
I am so weak.